"It's not like that in the magical world, 'Arry," Hagrid said, voice lowered in concern. "Y'see, when Vol... well, when You-Know-Who set up a trust deposit insurance scheme, 'e didn't account for rising interest rates. And 'e didn't give codflakes about whether it would influence currency issues abroad, or take into account nominal seasonal fluctuations in the GNP as accounted for in Dumbledore's rules. See, that's what makes him so evil, Harry; by doin' this he unpinned meaningful values from real estate an' just left 'em floatin', an' so the loss in equity was inevitable
1) Cook a 35-pound Butterball turkey so it's just exactly the way you like it. 2) Sequester the turkey up your left sleeve. 3) Go to your in-laws' house. While waiting for dinner to be served, do lots of small aerobic exercises with your left arm; the heat will keep the turkey warm. (Try not to be too obvious. If anyone asks, tell them you have an itch.) 4) As you sit down with everyone else at the dinner table, pick up your fork with your
we can do this movie the way Bakshi should have done it. IMHO, however, I can't see Minnie as Galadriel. The tall, beautiful Elven queen portrayed by some oversize Disney rodent? Some hormone-injected rat? I think not. Noooo, the beauty and wisdom of Galadriel and Celeborn must come through. I'd suggest Boris and Natasha for the parts. Maybe Minnie can play Arwen. Which suggests Mr. Peabody for Gandalf: he has both the wisdom and the attitude for the part. It's a bit of a departure from traditional casting, but I'd be sorely tempted to cast a woman as Saruman: Evil-lyn, from "He-Man and the Masters of the Universe". A powerful magician turned to evil, with a voice of silken iron
right hand, hold it up above your head, and say, "Hey! My fork's dirty!" 5) There will be approximately 1\4-to-1\5th of a second where everyone will be looking up at the fork in your right hand. While they are so doing, place the new turkey deftly onto the serving platter with your left hand and then palm your brother-in-law's turkey up your left sleeve. (You should practice this with turkeys at home for a few weeks before you attempt it with an audience.) 6) Smile, say, "Oh, I guess my fork's clean after all," and sit down to a delicious holiday meal.