Yes, dear reader, YOU may now buy the film rights to the greatest horror movie since Alfred Hitchcock's "Psycho"! Yes, at last the rights to Dr. E. Henry Thripshaw's script The Blue Horror are available to YOU at a very reasonable price!
Just look at this exciting synopsis, and you'll know BEYOND A DOUBT that THIS is the film you want to make!
Five teenagers - Bob, Jack, Tim, JoAnn and Barbara - go to a deserted cabin in the mountains for a weekend in early autumn. The cabin is lonely and out-of-the-way, and there is no communication to the outside world. The five are surprised by the fact that someone has broken into the cabin and has put up a different colour of wallpaper. However, they suspect nothing till Bob goes out to the outhouse and screams are heard. Sure enough, Bob has been eaten by the outhouse itself. They suspect something is amiss when they find five rocks in a circle singing "Nearer My God To Thee". That night a deep fog rolls in. Nobody can see anything further than a millimeter from their eyelids. Then Barbara begins screaming. The others race around the cabin trying to find her, but fail because of the fog. She stops screaming and tells them she had a nightmare about three men with three stools who took three canes and three matches and made three fires but only cooked one marshmallow. Morning arrives, and the fog clears. Barbara draws the attention of all to the fact that Jack has a pointed tail and bears a pitchfork. Jack explains that he always looks like that before his morning coffee. They note that there's no coffeepot and so he can't have any, whereupon he proclaims his allegiance with Satan. He chases the three through the woods, chanting epithets of doom and despair and singing old World War One tunes, when suddenly he screams, "Ye Gods! The Blue Horror!!!" and turns into a pumpkin and four white mice. The others run back to the car, intent upon leaving. They leap in, but the engine won't start. They look at it and note that everything is in perfect working order save the fact that the engine has turned into cardboard. They decide to coast down the mountainside. After they travel for a mile or so, however, a tree suddenly grows in their path and they crash. They are forced to go on foot. They go about one hundred yards when fifteen six-foot whiskey bottles step in front of them threateningly. JoAnn, the skeptic, laughs at them and says she doesn't believe in spirits. The pun is so bad that it kills her. Barbara and Tim gasp in horror and run back up the road towards the cabin. When they arrive they are horrified to see, standing in front of the cabin, three old men who ask them for a marshmallow. The two run screaming into the forest. In his haste to escape, Tim runs into an electrified fence and is killed. Barbara notes in horror that the fence isn't hooked to anything that could generate electricity. She does, however, find a sign which reads, "Blue Horror Fence Company". Then suddenly all the trees wither and die. Barbara senses evil. She looks over her shoulder and sees the Blue Horror!!! She turns instinctively to run, only to discover that a vandal has glued her feet to the ground. The Blue Horror slithers nearer, its long claws reaching up from the gelatinous body, its seven hundred eyes gleaming with disgust. She tries holding up a cross, a sprig of garlic, a bag of wolvesbane, a copy of Reader's Digest, a copy of Howard Hughes' will, and an 18-inch artillery cannon. The Blue Horror still approaches nearer. Seeing no escape, Barbara begins screaming at the top of her lungs. The Blue Horror claps a slimy blue claw over her mouth and says in a dignified manner, "What's wrong with you? I just was wondering if you wanted some cheesecake."
Isn't that the best idea you've ever HEARD???
Yes, and the film rights to The Blue Horror are available NOW for the incredibly low cost of FIFTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS! That's right, a mere FIFTEEN THOUSAND BUCKS for the rights to this MULTIMILLION-DOLLAR FILM!!
No bargain like this has EVER been offered! Just send a check or money order directly to us, and in mere days you'll have the FULL FILM RIGHTS to The Blue Horror! Remember that you have a MONEY BACK GUARANTEE! If you're not completely satisfied with The Blue Horror, just let us know within TEN DAYS and we will return as much of your money as we feel is appropriate.
ACT NOW! WRITE TODAY!(This offer may not be legal in all states.)